John Carmack Says He Doesn’t Have a Fancy Keyboard, and This Bothers Me
I have a ton of post ideas to get out into the world, and I probably should be working on something more relevant or useful, but there’s something I need to get off my chest…
John Carmack—legendary programmer. Work machine. Jujitsu master. The man who invented 3D video games. A man who wears the freshest clothes and eats at the chillest restaurants. Probably one of the top ten greatest programmers to have ever lived. But there’s just one problem with his legacy…the man uses a “pedestrian” keyboard.
On August 4th, 2022, The Lex Fridman podcast aired episode #309, where, for five solid hours, Mr. Carmack sets a supreme example of intellect and style, all while wearing a plain black T-shirt. Lex cuts to the main point of the interview rather early. At 56 minutes and 50 seconds into the episode, Lex asks Mr. Carmack: “Okay, what about your setup? How many screens? What kind of keyboard—is there something interesting? What kind of IDE? …What operating system? Laptop? Any interesting thing that brings you joy?”
Carmack goes on to comment mostly on advantages of modern IDEs and how they help in debugging code. After prattling on for ten minutes about niche techniques that save a bit of time for programmers, Lex finally brings the conversation back to the real issue of concern: hardware. Keyboard? Monitor? What does he have on the physical desktop. Mr. Carmack responds that he moved to a triple monitor setup a few years ago, and that this has been a “pure win.” He then says, at 1:08:45 “But, no, I don’t have a fancy keyboard or mouse, or anything…”
And that’s all he says.
He doesn’t even clarify what he means by “fancy.” Does he at least have a mechanical keyboard—just not customized? Or is Mr. Carmack’s process really to sit in front of three monitors, drinking Diet Coke all day, mushing his fingers into a squishy, clunky membrane keyboard he’s had for the past ten years?
Mr. Carmack, if you’re listening…or if any stragglers out there are wondering if they should invest in a mechanical keyboard, allow me to make the case. If you have a bit of disposable income, you may be thinking the first aspect of your life that should be made luxurious is the bed. After all, you spend a third of your life in your bed, so it should be maximized for comfort, right?
But what about the place where you spend a wakeful third of your life: the computer? Every weekday in your little cubicle: slaving away for some corporation that doesn’t think you’re a human. Every weekday night and weekend afternoon in your uncustomized home, at your uncustomized desk: pursuing some writing or gaming hobby on the weekends, uninspired and unskilled.
Why go through that with a keyboard that is pure trash?
Last Christmas I joined the mechanical keyboard community. I’m still a scrub, considering I only purchased a prebuilt Iquinix L80 with TTC Speed Silver linear switches, and I have not even redone the lube job. Do I know what’s so good about Zealios Burnt Navy Translucent Blue Box Panda Royals, or why HG7364 lube is so superior to HG7363? No. Do I know what 40’s week is, or important talking points in the debates on whether an actuation distance of under two millimeters is superior to two, or what half the content on /r/MechanicalKeyboards Subreddit is about? Do I have a personal “end game” keyboard in mind? The answer to all the questions, thus far, is no. But one does not need to have such knowledge in order to understand the beauty of a mechanical keyboard.
Here’s all you need to understand. When you are typing on a keyboard with solid keycaps and durable switches, you can try to murder the enter button on that thing. Slam that button down as hard as you’d like. There’s no bend. No clunk. No greasy, gritty keycap feel. Nothing happens other than you getting a nice, solid keypress. With a guaranteed lifespan of 100 million keypresses, you’ve got about 99.9 million more to go before you have to buy a new one (but you’re gonna buy a new one before that, because why would you own only one keyboard?). And if you’re a delicate soul, this keyboard is also for you. Type as light as a feather, and the keys still respond—if you went with linear switches. This keyboard knows everything about you and how you prefer to type, while you can only hope to know anything about it.
As the YouTuber, Tech Lead, says in his rundown of mechanical keyboards, these are the tools with which we carve out our destiny in humanity and shine our way—with south-facing RGB lighted keycaps—through life’s darkest corners. You are not a respectable programer / gamer / writer / ‘person who uses a keyboard for anything’ until you are the owner of a mechanical keyboard.
But if the guru, Mr. Carmack, doesn’t use a fancy keyboard, then is this all just a sham? Is a keyboard that’s solar powered, hot-swappable, splittable, with dual encoders, memory display, and embedded tenting really the answer to our needs as typists, or are we just losing ourselves in an endless rabbit hole where more and more parts and functionality is the only point, and there really is no end game in sight? Perhaps Mr. Carmack derives a different sort of abstract pleasure from his keyboards, where the more crappy keyboards he destroys, the more he feels he is a hard worker.
Whatever the case, in my place of employment, I still use the keyboard provided to me: a basic Lenovo. Just…a Lenovo. I don’t think it has a name. Now that I have an L80, I shudder at the thought that this thing once felt solid to my hands. And now that I know Mr. Carmack’s stance on keyboards, I shudder at the thought that this is what he uses. I may have to bring my L80 into work, but I’m not quite ready to out myself to my coworkers as a full-on keeb.
Mr. Carmack leaves his Twitter DMs open, though I don’t think a man with over a million followers would notice my message. Also, I’m not so sure I have a high enough ranking in the mechanical keyboard community to reach out on their behalf. If someone with an end game keyboard could ask Mr. Carmack about the specific keyboard he uses, please do.
When you do decide to upgrade your current keyboard, let me know maybe I'll buy your old one from you. Sadly I don't have the little blue checkmark by my name on Twitter (or even a Twitter account really) to reach out to John Carmack, but if I did...